Don’t cry over spilt milk. Unless it is breast milk. Then cry as long as you want. Then figure out a plan. So it wasn’t spilt milk in this case, but 5 bags left out overnight. At least they were in a cooler, but now had a 24 hour expiration date, instead of 6 months. I could either pump all day (bleh, no thanks, pumping is one of my least favorite things ever), dump them out (not a chance, this stuff is liquid gold!), OR try something I’ve wanted to try for forever. Like, forever, for at least the last month. Make cookies with breast milk! But I’m in the middle of a muscle gain challenge, so no cookies for me. Next best thing: Alfredo sauce over pasta and chicken! (Full disclosure, I wrote this when I was breastfeeding lots of years ago, and am finally just publishing it cuz I still believe that breast milk is awesome!)

Step 1

You’ll never believe the first step. Find a recipe (like this one) and …

Wait for it, drum roll … 

Replace cream/milk with breast milk. I know, mind-blowing.

Step 2

Make the Alfredo sauce. I’m assuming y’all are crunchy and pinteresty enough to find the resources to do this on your own. We ended up using mostly breast milk, plus a little bit of cream. Probably good for muscle gain, right?? 🙂 Since the breast milk was less creamy than cream (bah-dum-dum!), we cooked it a little longer.

Step 3

Eat the sauce. On top of noodles, or toast, or potatoes, or cheetos. Not judging. Are you ready for this? It’s going to taste like …

Wait for it, drum roll … 

Alfredo sauce! Again, mind-blowing.

But really. It’s milk. Mine happens to be a little sweeter than cow’s milk.

I’ve considered myself a little bit crunchy for a while now. I think this new story/event/adventure/whatever launches me into the full on hippie category with no way to turn back.

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The crazy stuff in my brain that may or may not belong in a blog:

I try to get answers by experimenting in life like this. This whole adventure seemed to raise more questions than answers. Why are some humans grossed out by breast milk? But why is it okay to feed it to our babies? Why was food connoisseur Gordon Ramsey repulsed by breast milk? (Well besides knowing how to get a reaction and ratings). How is cow’s/goat’s milk less disgusting than human milk? How long has human milk been “gross”? Will it ever be normal? How long will it take to become normal? Have  you consumed breast milk as an adult? I’d love a comment below from you!

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Conclusion #1: Breast milk is milk. And delish.

Conclusion #2: You can support this post by heading over to my etsy shop, where you can buy greeting cards originally painted with breast milk, or felt walls that are great gifts for toddlers (totally unrelated to this post, but this is my main gig these days! All sales support my cute family of 4). And all sales help NICU babies get this liquid gold.

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